The Narcassist and Empath Relationship

I want to debunk the myth of the Narcissist and Empath relationship and unravel some of our understandings we (as a group) may see or understand this relationship or judge it.  There is a lineage energy of victim consciousness that stems from wounding.  Victim consciousness can show up in a way that we are unaware of our own power and strength and our beliefs revolve around others having power, more power than we have.

I too identify as an Empath and I too have had narcissistic relationships in my life.  My parents, particularly my mother.  She was always grabbing for my energy to satisfy her unmet needs.  I always gave gave gave.  I say this with the deepest of compassion that my mother was deeply wounded.  She had some tough breaks in her life and it was heart breaking.  So her coping mechanisms were because of her childhood trauma.  Fast forward to my adulthood and taking responsibility for myself, I too see how I absorbed that learned behaviour.  Taking on other people’s energy and grabbing for their energy because I didn’t want to look at my wounds and it was an easy way to “heal”.   Which isn’t really healing, it is overtaking from a perspective of fear.  Getting what you need from others instead of Source and yourself.  No respect for your own boundaries and that of others.  To be clear, this is how I learned to survive and this has been my unwinding.

So in complete transparency, vulnerability and compassion, that I speak to this human conditioning that is so rampant in our society.  There is a lack of respect for ourselves that we just didn’t learn from our parents and that they didn’t learn from their parents and so on.  This can be attributed back to the story of Adam and Eve.  They didn’t respect God’s wishes, now it is part of the human experience.  There is deep deep ancestral wounding that we carry within our energy systems from our lineage and you can paint it up anyway you want with fancy diagnosis’s such as narcissism or spectrum, the fact of the matter is in order to heal this world, we all need to do our work.  And our work is stepping into the wounding.  Taking responsibility for our actions, our words, our lives and being accountable to ourselves.  We need to get our boots on and wade through it all and examine it, turn over the rocks, look at them closely, and look at them again.  Because if we don’t we can’t have the lives that we are meant to have.  We can’t fulfill our purpose and we can’t feel peace, happiness and fulfillment.  You just can’t.  Our capacities won’t allow it.  We need to release energies to bring in the things we want.  It is an ever changing cycle.

We are in a society that is so disrespectful of themselves that they can’t respect one another.  And if we haven’t been taught respect, we need to learn it from somewhere.  We can turn our gaze from outward to upward to God the Father.  Then we are getting somewhere, we are being guided by our own true hearts, and  Universal Love and our own Divinity.  It is the only way.  We need to turn inwards to ourselves for the answers, because they are there and that is the most respectful loving thing you can do for yourself.  It is to let go of the fear of our Divinity and be guided with ease and grace.

I have always wanted to post about narcissism but I felt I could never do it from a place of love until now.  I love my mother and I hold boundaries so that I may not be further wounded by her wounding and that goes for anyone.  I love myself firstly. I let go of the martyrdom. I let go of the over giving. I let go of all those things that make me want to reach out for someone else’s energy and I get SOURCED for myself.  If there is something that I want that someone else has, that is a good indication that I need it.  So I need to ask Source for help.  Please Creator provide me with …. Or I meditate and work with my soul on it.  Use a tool, any tool but we need to self soothe, self provide, self heal, and connect with SELF.

So what I would like to say to you is that it is the law of attraction.  If you have narcissistic parents, or relationships, your work is internal.  You need to energetically unravel this absorbed energy and your attachments to others and reestablish your attachments to yourself, Source and Mother Earth and let go of those narcissistic behaviours that were handed down to you.  How do you do that?  You get on your boots and wade through it.  The answers are there!  Trust yourself.  The truth is no one can do it for you.  I have direct first hand knowledge that we can try to do it for someone else, but it never works and it isn’t meant to.  We have to learn how to hold our own space, our own energies, our own healing in the sacredness of who we are and understand that we aren’t alone.  We all have our trauma, our woundings, our stories, it just matters how you want to be in this life.  How do you want to be in this life?  If you want a better life, then do your work.  And if you aren’t sure about how to do your work, then pray on it.

This post is really a scary thing for me to admit, talk about and write about, but it feels so true for me that I hope it reaches those that are wading through their darkness and don’t understand, can’t comprehend and are grabbing for other people’s energies because they don’t know what to do.  They have themselves so tightly wound up that they don’t know what to do.  You need to get quiet, calm and introspective.  You need to get off the hamster wheel and cut yourself some slack.  Get into nature and write it down, one problem at a time, and pray for guidance, help and support.  Let go of the chaos.  You can do it!!!  I know you can do it because I have been there too.  It can be healed and you have the power to heal yourself.  Just believe and give yourself time and kindness.

With the greatest respect for your journey, I send you compassion, respect and wisdom.

With love,

Jackie