Child Spirituality

I woke early this morning to work on something that came up for me yesterday and as I sat with what I was working through, it was fundamental in my development that I didn’t receive as a child.

I was fortunate enough to have a lovely woman and her child visit me yesterday and she was very nurturing and wonderful.  She asked me if I had any children and I told her no.  I realized that there were fundamental foundational pieces that were missing in my system that was apparent for her and her child.

Many times I have heard or it’s come to my awareness that we are to leave children be to find their own way in their spiritual journey.  I would say that I disagree with this.  Having to establish a foundation at the age of 57 does not give you the tools that I could have benefited from up until this point.

I read this article once from a pastor at a church and he said that it was the parent’s role to “Bring spirit to life within their children”.  This means to awaken the child’s soul within them.  To prepare them for their lives and to establish a foundation in which they can grow, change and learn.  That is their responsibility as parents.  They are to teach balance to their children emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually.  When they have a foundational piece of spirituality, they are able to source from God the necessary emotions, tools, resources that they need to have a stable, brave and flow of life.  Where they can weather the storms of disappointment, failure, tragedy even death. They then have the ability to realize that they know what to do and when to do it.  When you don’t have the spiritual foundational piece, you can be stuck in a concretized space of not ever knowing what to do.  This can create chaos, fight, flight, freeze, and emotional by-passing, all kinds of unhealthy ungrounded behaviours. And that is no way to live.

When we leave children to find their own way, it can be so big and confusing that they don’t have a foundational piece to explore, to understand, to learn their knowing, to trust within themselves what works for them and what doesn’t.  You come from such a place of deficit that the way to trusting and believing in yourself leaves you with the lowest of self esteem and lack of confidence to take steps to move forward.

In order to build this self esteem, it is critical in those growing years to encourage and walk your children through their decision making process and feeling into what is right for them so that they can always draw on tools of success for themselves.  That is what creates confidence and trust in oneself.  Actually topping that off with a good dose of encouragement, proud, kind, and loving reassurance gives children a foundation to source themselves emotionally as well.  It is a calming of the nervous system when you move through decisions and changes that allows for their authenticity to shine through.  To be good humans and to love themselves with self compassion and a pep talk of “I can do it” or “atta boy/girl”, those are the things that we want to establish and remember so that we can be more in the state of grace.  This way we can weather the mistakes, the things that don’t work out and all the other things that come our way.  It builds resilience.

So consider that perhaps your parents or our parents parents didn’t have the ability or know how or didn’t receive their “atta boy/girl”, but how can you receive yours so that you can do it for yourself and your children?  I say, pray on it.  Ask and you will receive.  God is good that way.

And if you didn’t receive from your generational line, look at it through a compassionate lens and give them their “atta boy/girl” for the best that they tried to do with the tools that they had available to them.  Give yourself the gift of learning what perhaps wasn’t passed down to you, and give yourself the “atta boy/girl” for your spiritual growth, your sacred process, and the wisdom to change yourself and the bravery and courage to help your children to regulate their own emotions.  When you can do that for yourself, then you can teach others to do the same for themselves.

What does spirituality mean? I don’t mean dropping them off at church and hoping for the best. Explore the richness of the soul. What is the wisdom of your own Soul? What is your direct connection to God. What does God have in store for you in this life time? What feels good when you connect with Source/Creator? If spirituality is in all things, what is it in you? This exploration is rich glorious and graceful and it is a place of wonder, magic, and fortitude. It is building resilience, kindness, and structure within. It is the whole gambit of the human experience, we just have to be willing to open ourselves up and see that the fear isn’t real. It’s a practice worth incorporating.

What foundations pieces do you struggle with?  Do you feel like a victim much of the time?  What can you ask for that will help you feel more empowered?  Your spiritual team is always there to help and ask God to hover over you and give you what you need.  And if you don’t know what you need, tell God you don’t know what you need, and ask him/her what it is you do need.  You will get the answer, you just need to believe.

I celebrate with you that the answers are within you and the more you are connected spiritually, the more you can walk this earth as a more stable, brave soul that can flow with the beauty that life has to offer.

Cheers to you and your spiritual journey.

Warmly,

Jackie